Lessons on education, training and finances start early on. As a parent, you will start observing your children and their strengths. A child who is very good with their hands and has very strong hand eye coordination is a good candidate for a job as an engineer, dentist, surgeon, hairdresser or a variety of other jobs that utilize those skill sets. A child who is a who excels at academics early on could eventually be a good student of law, medicine or have a career doing research. The more you’re with your children as time goes on these strengths become crystal clear which helps in steering your child into a career path, they are most likely to Have success in. By the time they get to high school you’ll have it narrowed down.
As a parent you will ‘train‘ your child in many ways, from their behavior, to how to be part of a family helping out with chores, how to get along in the world and how to get along with others. The parents will be the first and most important teacher in instilling these skills. Most likely you will seek out teachers and coaches who are on the same page for continuity in the child’s life.
When it comes to finances that starts early too. Life is a series of choices. For example, take going to the movies. Sometimes it’s cheaper to go early in the day rather than later in the evening. So you say your kids we can go see the newest release of a movie. It’s _____ price to go at one o’clock in the afternoon on a Saturday and it’s this _______ price to go at 7 o’clock in the evening on a Saturday when do you think is the best time to go since we’re buying five tickets? Do the same thing with choices as your families makes from vacations to purchasing a car. As your kids become old enough, have these discussions with them at the kitchen table. When our kids were growing up, we bought our cars from a family friend named Bill Ross. Bill gave us a straight scope. Bill knew that we were interested in the best price on a car. He knew we needed a family vehicle to get a family of five around town and to sporting events. He would always let us know what the best deal was going. It didn’t matter to us whether it was a Yukon or it was a minivan. We always looked at the best price. The kids were in on this conversation, too. I remember one year Brad had a friend who had a Cadillac and he wanted to test drive one. I remember Bill saying to him, “Listen I’m going to make more money if you buy the Cadillac, but the Buick LaCrosse is a very similar nice smooth drive. I don’t think you are impressed with the Cadillac name so if I were you, I’d take them both for a drive but I think you’ll be happiest with the Buick LaCrosse .” that’s how we shopped for a car and we ended up with not only one LaCrosse but a second one when that lease was up. Brad and Sasha rode to the church for her wedding in one of those cars.
The more your kids hear this type of discussion the more they are learning about finances. When it comes time to make those choices about college, of course the cost is a big factor. Most high schools offer a program with a local community college that allows high school students to take college classes and then enroll on campus the year after graduation and they end up with a good amount of college credits under their belt and further ahead in college without the additional cost.Inquire about these program when your kids are in middle school. We have friends who have three girls. All three girls took advantage of this program in high school, which resulted in six years of college credits under their belt at no additional cost. That is a lot of money saved for that family. Consider how much money you need to make before taxes to pay for that amount of college! Do the math and do it with your kids! Ask lots of questions of your middle school and high school counselors So that when the time comes, you kids can take advantage of these programs.
When your kids are applying to college make a visit and arrange an appointment at the finance office. They will be able to tell you what scholarships are available for your child. If they qualify for an honors college program, there may be some additional scholarship. Colleges and universities are in competition always so they are willing to entice students to their program with scholarships. Let the representative you are speaking with know that you’re shopping around and that cost matters. Again, let your child in on these discussions.
As your kids are deciding on their field of study when they get to college, do some investigative research as to how much money they can anticipate earning in their preferred career choice. They want to weigh that against the cost of the education. If they are taking loans out, explain to them how long will take them to pay these loans off. Colleges are very quick to enroll students with the understanding of student loans. Do the math with your son or daughter and show them how long they will be paying for this college education and how much it will cost them in the long run. At a time when they are entering the job market, they could be saddled with loan payments. They may need to buy a car and eventually they may want a home. Making good choices early may give them more freedom later on.
Do not underestimate the value of skilled trades. A degree in cosmetology, plumbing, electrical,welding or golf course management from a local training program could get your child onto their career path earlier, most likely with less or no debt. If you have a son or daughter who is focused on a skill they could get their training in a high school skilled trades program or local community college, get their certification and start earning money. If they desire to have their own salon or plumbing/electrical company they could take some business classes later down the road in the evening or online. Without the debt and ability to begin earning early on, they are well on their way into adulthood.
Explain to your kids the benefits of saving. Take your son or daughter to an appointment with your accountant and let them sit in on your conversations. Explain terms like retirement, 401K, savings account, taxes, or social security. Explain how taxes fit into the equation. I remember when our adult kids got their first paycheck it was a shock to them as to how much they pay in taxes. Explain the things you need to pay for as an adult. If you have your own business there is overhead. When our kids had their own lawn business, it was a wide awakening for them to learn that they had to pay for gas, oil and the maintenance of their lawn mowers. Those expenses cut into their earnings. It was a good experience for our kids to have their own business cutting lawns. It was hard work to push a lawnmower. They learned many valuable lessons from that experience. They had to go out and get jobs, go door to door and ‘sell themselves’ as a good option for lawn cutting services.
We had a discussion with one of our kids, not too long ago and his comment was “what a lot of people don’t understand is that it’s really hard to make a living. Kids don’t understand all the expenses that go along with adult life.“ As I mentioned last week, there’s nothing wrong with partnering with your kids to help them along the way. However, it is a big mistake to do too much for your kids. When you decide to do something for your kids, make sure your partnering with them so that you’ll got the results that you want. You don’t want to help your kids out with their rent, and then they look at us that is an opportunity for them to spend more on a luxury car because you help them. If you have a good financial relationship with your kid early on the chances of this happening or less likely. I would shy away from funding too many luxurious items and experiences for your adult son daughter. You want them to earn these “goodies” rather than come to expect them to be provided by you. There’s nothing wrong with teaching your kids the concept of delayed gratification and working hard for what they have. Consider how long you want to work to provide a supplemental lifestyle for your young adult. Eventually, you will want to retire and they need to learn to do things on their own. If you want to give them a gift here there that’s a great idea, but to fund your adult children can become an overwhelming undertaking on your part (it will become more and more expensive to do that) and like I have said before, you are robbing your kids of the satisfaction of doing it themselves. When kids can finance their own lives, it gives them a sense of self satisfaction that can not be purchased. The financial success your kids have in managing and saving their own money, most likely will inspire them to continue to be financially responsible. Be wise and intentional with the assistance you give your adult children. Carefully think about how you give these gifts. Consider every angle of the help and do not allow your help to be mis-directed or misused. You can give a gift with strings attached to make sure the money is being used wisely.
Weddings. These are emotional life events that can cause people to spend more money than the intend. The wedding planners and people who offer services in this field can inspire you to get off track from your original plans. This is not done with any ill will or intent. Those who are in the business of weddings like to give customers options. They are unaware of your finances or personal situations. You need to plan a wedding with your head screwed on right. Don’t overspend and don’t spend money you don’t have. I know a father who offered his daughter a lump sum of money and when he gave it to her and her fiancé he told them to spend it as they wished they could spend it on a wedding or they could use that money towards a down payment in a house. The young couple spent about $1000 on a small wedding with only immediate family members for the wedding, and they had the remaining money to spend on the down payment of a house. I see more and more people taking that option. A young man, I know commented “Not everyone can afford an over the top wedding. Those who can, good for them.” He stated that “the problem is that people post pictures on social media of their very extravagant events and others feel they have to follow suit.“ Speak with your adult children about how much is a reasonable amount to spend for a wedding and what the the expenses of adult life require. Kids do not understand all of this unless you explain it to them. They have no idea what to expect and how expensive basic necessities in life can become because they are not there yet. Inform them, they need to know and hear your wisdom from experience. Making wise choices early on can result in a more manageable financial situation down the road. Leading to many…Great Days 🍎
