We were recently on vacation having lunch when we started a conversation with a couple sitting next to us. We talked about where we all were from, what our families were like and places we enjoyed traveling. We came to learn that Edward Kisling is the author of several books, from children’s to non-fiction to adult mystery. In the conversation, Edward made a comment that has stuck with me, “Every time someone dies, a library burns down.” Edward explained that it wasn’t his quote, when I commented on how interesting this phrase was. It is a quote from Malian writer and ethnologist, Amadau Hamite Ba. His original phrase was “When an elder dies a library burns down,” an African proverb that emphasizes the importance of knowledge passed down orally from one generation to another. What an incredibly true statement…
Edward Kisling’s books (available on Amazon)
When I was starting my website and blog post six years ago a title was needed the recipes page, I liked the idea of alliteration, a phrase with each word beginning with the same letter and needed a work for food that began with the letter M. A phone call to my cousin, Mitsa, (interesting a name beginning with an M also)who knows all things Macedonian (my father was Macedonian if you are a new reader). The first word that came to mind was Manja. The question to Mitsa was “Could Manja be used in the title Mary Yana’s Marvelous Monday Mystery Manja and would it make sense being used in this context?” Mitsa gave the ok and, Mary Yana’s Marvelous Monday Mystery Manja is going strong.
Mitsa was my go to person for all things Macedonian from food to customs to who was related to whom. The phone calls would start with the question at hand and end up with an update on one another’s lives. Each call was usually at least an hour and one day I remember taking her call from the checkout line at Walmart, I left the line and proceeded to walk through the store for the treasured call from my cousin. Looking back now, I miss those calls. She passed away five years ago and when she did, her wealth of knowledge of all things Macedonian died too. Ed Kisling was right…
With the internet, as great and accessible as it is, we sometimes so quickly go to the easiest source. The internet does allow us to do so much research at the tip of our fingers if we have a phone, IPad or laptop so easy in reach. Technology is a good thing, but like anything, there is good and not so good in it. For example, take the calculator. It was a great invention as it allows one to easily check costs, figures and math. What can also do is make one lazy and not use their brain. I remember a tutor of our son, Mrs. Scittino, who told me that her math students were becoming lazy because of the use of a calculator. She stressed the importance of basic computation skills. Her students would say, “Why do I need to know long division and multiplication when I can use the calculator on my phone?” She would respond with, “What if your battery goes on your phone or you don’t have your phone, YOU NEED TO KNOW BASIC MATH SKILLS!”
The same can be true with knowledge. For example, if you have a child who is doing a report on Vietnam and grandpa or a great uncle fought in Vietnam, why not arrange a visit and a conversation with them? If your child is doing a report on Russia and your neighbors emigrated from Russia, why not call and ask if they can get together to share their experience? First hand knowledge from someone who was there, can enhance the easily accessible research from the internet. It can also give one a “ring side seat on history” perspective.
When I was growing up, my maternal grandparents were seven hundred miles away, phone calls were expensive and we made one trip a year to see them. I knew very little about my mother’s parents. My paternal grandparents were both deceased before I was born. Aunts and uncles of my father’s filled in some of the information but it was limited. Children today, with the advent of technology can easily be in touch with grandparents or other family member via phone calls, FaceTime or Zoom. How incredibly fortunate those living today are to have access to all of this.
As a parent or grandparent make the effort to make this happen for your children and if you can make it a regular part of your weekly, bimonthly or whenever you can fit it into your life, try to do it. Eventually, your children may begin to do it more and more on their own, enforcing that bond of the elder to the child. Every phone calls and conversation can enhance the relationship for both parties. For a child to have the love and input in their life of another adult who has only good intent for them, in addition to the parents is a good thing and think about how this makes the elder or grandparent feel…Can anyone have too many people who love them…I think not. Thanks to Edward Kislingfor sharing this incredible proverb with me, and now I am sharing it with you, keeping a “library” open and knowledge flowing from one individual to the next, and so on, making for more great days 🍎
